Social Media Do's and Don'ts

Valerie Eagan Mangrum

The information in this article is good for anyone but I am writing this with our college freshmen in mind, in particular. Something happens as soon as you walk across that stage at commencement and receive your diploma. You also get handed a giant pile of new-found independence. And just like Peter Parker's Uncle Ben told him in Spiderman, "with great power comes great responsibility."

Here are some basic guidelines for you as you head out into the great, big world out there.

Join Facebook, Twitter & LinkedIn. Plus any other new, social media/networking sites that pop up and prove reliable. I hear people say "I'm not on Facebook because I don't want people seeing all my stuff and I don't want to have to keep up with everyone." That's the beauty of social networking. You're in control. You decide what goes on your profile. You decide how much time you'll spend surfing the web and hanging out online. Just be responsible. Like anything, when used in moderation, it can be a wonderful tool for staying in touch with friends and family and finding a job.
Network with people of similar interests. Are you thinking about joining a fraternity, sorority or social club but haven't quite made up your mind? Find their Facebook page and get a feel for what they do, who's involved and if you think it would be a good fit for you. Interested in a hobby? Find a group or fan page and connect with others (possibly even at your school or in your city) who share your interest.
Check your privacy settings. The default settings are not always in your best interest. Go in to your account and set everything to the most private setting. There's no reason a complete stranger should see your photos, your posts or really anything about you. Remember you are not alone. We'll talk more about this in a minute but remember with every picture you post and every status update and comment you share, your mother, Grandma, your pastor, your professors, and, yes, even future employers are online, too. Don't post anything you wouldn't show or say directly to any of these people.

DON'T

Use swear words. You know them. We know you know them. But you don't have to use them. Especially in writing. It comes across as vulgar and immature. And let me tell you, anyone you're trying to impress (girlfriend/boyfriend, professor, employer) will take one look at that and make a quick decision on you. And it won't be favorable.
Post questionable photos of yourself. Again, before you post a picture of yourself online for, literally, all the world to see, think of two people: your Dad and your Grandma. If you're OK with them seeing this picture then go ahead. But again, if you're painted in an unfavorable or distasteful way, professors, employers, church leaders, hopeful dates…they'll say "no, thank you" faster than you can say, "hey, check this out."
Talk smack. Don't slam former boyfriends/girlfriends. Don't complain about your parents not giving you enough money. Don't whine about having too many or not enough shifts at your job. Don't question your professor's credibility or teaching prowess. Facebook and the internet are amazing resources and tools that we have access to but don't get caught up in thinking it's a private platform for you to air your dirty laundry. You can do all this but just not online for everyone to see. Share these thoughts in a more intimate setting, perhaps with a friend over coffee. Or, better yet, just think it and don't actually say it out loud.
Avoid confrontation. It's tempting to use Facebook to "say" things but not actually say them. "_______ makes me so mad." Or, worse, a vague attack. "Don't you hate it when people let you down." If you have a problem with someone, discuss it with them like the civilized human being you are. The web and social networking sites are great assets to our culture but don't let them take the place of real, honest communication.
Post your personal information. The people who need your physical address and phone number probably already have it. Don't post personal information online for just anyone to see. And be careful about information you share in your status, on a friend's wall or in a comment that will give cyberstalkers an indication of where and when you will be. Something as seemingly innocent as "uggh…8 am economics class stinks" or "i'm getting my ice cream on at Maggie Moo's tonight" can be a stalker's dream come true.

That's all I have. If you read some or all of this, I applaud you. Whether you skimmed or studied it whole-heartedly, I hope my overall message came through not as preaching or fussing but as sincere concern for you. I want you all to do well and prosper and be the wonderful, cool, awesome people I know you are.

Valerie Eagan Mangrum '92
Director of Alumni & Community Relations

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