Water Water Everywhere

I walked out on to the docks, splattered with moonlight and spotted with light from the light posts on the dock. Each lean post sat in its little circle of light around it. I walked along the dock looking at the boards that were slowly coming apart. I would walk past a light post and the dock would be flooded with light, but I would keep moving and walk through the light to be enveloped by the dark shadows of the night again.

I loved to come down here at night, to walk along the docks in the brisk night air. I loved to hear the creaking of the planks and the sway of the un-solid mass beneath me. It was like a friend, welcoming me back.

Every now and then a fish would swim into a lighted spot of water, but it would dart right back out, as if stung by the light. My feelings mimicked those of the fish, I loved the night. Most people thought me insane to love dark, cloudy days and rain storms. There was something about them that was just…calming.

I looked at the boats as I passed, my father had once owned a boat, but he had to sell it because my mum had insisted he did not use it enough. She was very persistent and he finally parted with it as though letting go of an old friend’s hand as he hung over the edge of a steep cliff.

I loved the feeling of being out here. Land is so restraining. You cannot move through land with the kick of a leg or a simple stroke. You could not dive down deeper to look into the depths of land. You can only move forward backwards or sideways. In water you can move everyway you can think of.

It had been so long since I had frolicked with water. Let it embrace me and welcome me with its cool touch, to its limitless possibilities. I missed water like one might miss a friend.

I felt imprisoned in the confinements of movement on the land. You could not duck below to hide in the earth; it is not welcoming, and certainly not a friend. It does not slowly let you into it, breaking your fall; it instead brings you to a stunning halt, causing your breath to spring from your chest. It does not welcome you, surrounding you with it’s self but instead pushes you away like an unwanted stranger, I did not want to be a stranger, but a friend. And here was my friend. Here I had found a friend many years ago. A friend that never got tired of me, and was always happy to see me, lapping up at me as if encouraging me to come in and let it wrap it’s arms around me.

I wanted with all my might to dive in and dance and play with my friend, but knew that I could not. The land still restrained me even at a distance. I wanted to jump and here the  satisfying splash of water coming up to greet me and encircle me in it. To surround me with it’s self and play into the night. To release me from the shackle  digging into my ankle; more commonly known as life. But I looked wearily down at my old friend and chose not to. I couldn’t play today. But I didn’t know that that wasn’t my choice to make.



The dock had decided for me, catching my foot with a nail protruding from it.

I fell unceremoniously head first into the water. I loved the water but when forced into it, was not fond of it.

I started up to the top but could not go. Something was holding me down, no pulling me down. I opened my eyes and saw the surface winking at me, teasing me, tantalizingly close, growing steadily away, my life growing farther from me.

I kicked against destiny, cursing it as I rebelled against its forces. My head broke the water and was instantly met with the cool feeling of the crisp dock air. The water slid off my head and into my eyes as I blinked and hauled myself onto the hard wood dock, feeling the rusty nails digging into my skin.

Water seemed to seep from every inch of me as I lay there praising air. I let it bleed from me and through the cracks of the dock to join to swirling mass mere inches beneath me. I cursed my joints as I lifted my heavy body from the wood planks and sat myself unsteadily on my feet. I walked out to the earth, silently forgiving the water for being unable to deny itself my company. Everyone had their heroine, company is water’s. It must get lonely to be only accompanied by fish and boat bottoms.

I pledged it that I would indeed be visiting it again. It pledged me that it would be more wary next time. I looked behind myself once more as I stepped off the dock and onto the cool concrete that met it. The water lapped lazily at the dock as the wood swayed in the gleam of the moon. Nothing had changed; all was the same as before.